I am seventy three years old and my life has been shaped by the absence of my twin sister Ella. We were five when a fever confined me to bed at my grandmother’s house while Ella played outside. The house suddenly felt too quiet and the police arrived to search the woods throughout the night. They found only her red ball and the police told my parents her body was found later. There was never a funeral or a grave to visit and her name was erased from our home.
I learned to carry my grief in silence because my mother refused to speak about the tragedy. Every time I asked a question she shut down and claimed I was causing her unnecessary pain. I grew up feeling incomplete and often caught myself setting an extra plate at the dinner table. I built a full life with a husband and children but I always felt the phantom presence of the sister I lost.
A trip to visit my granddaughter at college changed everything when I stopped at a local café. I heard a familiar voice and looked up to see a woman who looked exactly like me standing in line. I approached her in shock and asked if she was Ella but she introduced herself as Margaret. She explained she was adopted and we quickly realized through comparing our histories that we were connected.
I went home and searched through old family boxes until I found an adoption file dated five years before my birth. My mother had been forced to give up her first child due to being young and unmarried. DNA results confirmed that Margaret is my full older sister rather than the twin I lost in the woods. My mother had three daughters but only kept me while losing one to adoption and another to the forest.